Our land is nothing but wet, smells like chewed grass…My eyes are hunting the seconds on the clock…My chest is full of fears; just cannot breath in well, and breath out enough…Something is missing in this scene; could it be because of tides?

Yet there comes the tide of the silent sea…We are confused more and more…Who knows now where we came from, and where we’re going to?

Having slept just 4 hours, my eyeballs are not happy today, but who cares about that?!?
Last night, after 03:35, there was a far voice deep inside my brain:

Are you on the right way?
If your way doesn’t bring “Her” to you, that means you’re in the wrong direction…And whenever you realize this, just leave both “Her” and that way, immediately find the right direction…

You may be full of thoughts and answers for your very own questions…That’s why tides are for, right?
How about her questions and unanswered dilemmas, do you have something in your backpack for her, too?

Once the rainbow dissappears, that doesn’t mean the colors are lost forever…Tides know how to bring her back, as well as they took her away…

Tonight, just like all the other lonely nights, my feet are feeling the damp sand on the bottom…Sea has taken itself a little away from us…Yet we both hear the waves, and smell the iodine from this far…Darkness doesn’t let us see the sea, but it is right in front of us…Just like the happy rainbow up in the blue sky…We know it is up there, but our eyes are too poor yet to see the free sky…

I was just looking at this fantastic endless horizon line, to my eyes towards the end of my Ocean where the sea and the cloudless parliament blue skies meet each other…I was so myself anymore and the Ocean blinked at me all the way from the horizon line…The Sun was about to set down towards the back hills of sleepy mountains…Every living creature was getting a little bit tired and sleepy, except me…

This quick flash of a light could be one from the deck lights of a freighter ship, or could be a tired star falling from never ending high lands…But I believe this light was a miracle sign which took all my attention as well as my bored soul…I felt like I just woke up from a deadly sleep…

The Ocean came to me as I realized that I was a conscious self anymore, open and willing to receive all the eternal love and peace of the universe which I was promised…I guess I was chosen…

Since last Monday night I have been feeling like the most distinguished human on the entire earth…The Ocean captured me with its never changing scent…Her scent never changes but every each time I smell her and carry her scent to the deepest dungeons of my brain cells, she smells so different and unique…Every each time I take her inside my body through my nasals it feels like I am smelling her for the first time…

It has been just a week now since I met the Ocean…She came to me in my dreams first, then I chose to go and visit her by her shores…Now, it seems like it is the most impossible thing to leave this never ending and never fading beach of my Ocean…

It was the time, I was so thirsty…Actually, how could you fulfill your thirst with salty water? I could, because I knew before I was there by the sea that she is the only and eternal water source which I needed after all those hard times in life…it was just there in the eyes of the Ocean…I have been looking right in her eyes almost everyday since I saw her…Have I told you yet she is so shy? My Ocean even blushed when I tell her about my crimson dream the other night…Yet she listened to me and even replied…

Like the last 7 days I have been waiting, watching, admiring, sleeping, walking, eating, smiling, longing on this far beach…I am so far from being content yet of what I was given by the endless seas, but the Ocean tells me to be patient and just stay where I am standing still…She doesn’t let me jump in her cool water and swim and resurrect forever…

Yesterday I have thrown a pebble with the intention of catching her attention and today she gave me back some sea weed in return…I smelled the freshness and hope for some fish for the next time…She is so full of fishes, I know and I even saw big and most probably tasty fishes a few mornings ago…

It is almost dawn now and nothing but her changing colors are covering all my view…Really, why I was here, not sure…Only one hope I assume was keeping me waiting and waiting almost down on my knees and that is being a part of the Ocean…

Wherever she puts me in I know I will accept…The Ocean may choose to place me by the coral reefs or in the steepest holes where there is barely life, or she may choose to sit me just next to the seaweeds… I can strive the whirlpools in the wildest hurricanes, and I can fight with the monster octopus for her…Just the dream of being one day in the heart of the Ocean would keep me going on and struggling with all the questions of mind; especially to be, or not to be?

Of course I would like to be! To be her one and only lover…Alas, there is the foolish possibility that the Ocean is not aware of me, or she may be waiting for someone else to come by and stand by her…

The risk of not being able to feel the Ocean all over my body in and out sounds like the end of life, a start for the hell…But I don’t want to get burnt, all I need is the life of water and to get wet and stay there forever in the heart of the Ocean…

This is like being blessed…If I continue living the rest of my life with her, I feel for sure, She will make me live longer and longer as I protect her from the wilderness, from the unnecessary litters of the contemporary social madness…I know already, I will accelerate in creating art and literature…I will be drawing pictures of dreams and writing stories of legends only for her eyes…As I already started dreaming even before I met her, and as you read this short story, I know by my heart that any risk which will lead me to the end of this heaven is worth for the Ocean, because in every word I have dreamt of her love made me feel invincible within the moments we share with her…

Me, my naked self and the Ocean are sitting right in front of each other face to face…
She is looking right into my eyes, I cannot take my mind and my eyes of her…
Falling in love is another way of getting reborn…
My name could be forgotten so easily, but her name will be told forever and ever, until she realizes that she is so alone…
The heart of the Ocean only belongs to her real self, until she feels the touch of my naked self…

“GALATA TOWER” was oil painted on a 40cm X 50cm pressed canvas in 2008…
The idea came out from a tower entrance ticket left behind after a devastating love relation…I just had a big desire for immortalizing my memories of those days by simply placing the ticket itself on the pressed canvas, and started painting around the ticket…

When you have a closer look into the painting, you can easily see the statement written on the ticket for the tower. It says “A night that can never be forgotten…”

Galata Tower was built in 1348 by Genoese poeple…It is located on one of the several hills in İstanbul which sees the Bosphorus sea, as well as almost all over İstanbul…

“Inca’s Treasure Map” was oil painted on a 30cm X 40cm pressed canvas in 1996 in Ankara…
The whole pressed canvas was painted with several different colors in several different layers over and over…Then the final view was obtained by scratching the layers one by one, until I reached the deep of the ground where the “Inca’s Treasure” was burried…

You can see the labyrinth with the dead ends, painted in blood color…There is no way out if you choose those dead ends…

You can also see the 3 codes to be broken in order to open and find the correct way to the treasure around the labyrinth painted in gold powder…

There is only one way which takes us to the treasure hall, which is in the deepest layer of the ground, painted in gold powder…

“RED WET DREAMS” on a 150cm X 100cm canvas was painted in a long period of time…It took for me to finish it almost a year…

A bigger version of the painting is in the “ARTS” page above if you are interested in seeing the details…

You can easily recognize two different full hand prints in the bottom loops, left and right…These hand prints are definitely male and female hands…If you can use the crimson joy part of your imagination you may come up to a certain point that there will be no way back for you from thinking on a sexual intercourse but nothingelse when you look into the symmetrical form of the upper loops and lower loops of the “butterfly”like shape and the deeply sacred yellow tunnel in the middle…

A man and a woman is making love to eachother on the classic position and this gives out the symmetry of lovers’ during their reproduction process…Just try to visualize or just fantasize…A male reproduction organ and a female reproduction organ…This is the animation of an extremely natural simple making love process…Everybody does it, right? Anybody ever thought of sexual intercourse as a symmetry before?

In fact; over all the canvas is painted to show how decorative could sperms be on our walls…Blue is the flowing color of male and female love juices where they are especially mixed together in the upper two loops…Yes, this the very sexual intercourse moment of a male and a female, which always reminds me the symmetry, and the equality derived from that symmetry…

]]> http://www.hakanguzhan.com/2009/05/18/red-wet-dreams-150cm-x-100cm-oil-painting-on-canvas-by-hakan-guzhan/feed/ 2 http://www.hakanguzhan.com/2009/05/05/moonset/ http://www.hakanguzhan.com/2009/05/05/moonset/#comments Tue, 05 May 2009 09:40:55 +0000 admin http://hakanguzhan.com/?p=448 The moon has set, / You, too, have left... Your eyes, / Your half an hour long words. Leaving nothing behind... A quiet waltz in the evening…/ Like the usual dance of the birds and of their false friends, the hunters… / […]]]>

The Moon has set

You, too, have left…
Your eyes,
Your half an hour long words.
Leaving nothing behind…
A quiet waltz in the evening…
Like the usual dance of the birds
and of their false friends, the hunters…
The moon has set,
You, too, have left…
Your eyes, winking towards loneliness,
are of a silent and blurry green
The night can be deceitful…
For now, the whole city is in pitch black…
 

Sun is up
and
you’re gone.
You will not see the light!
I will be in worse sorrow than
the irresolute desert heat in your eyes.
I don’t want to utter a word now.
Sun is rising
and you are leaving
Alas, does my heart not ask why!
No consolation to be found in the smiles
of the coy night sky.
Though your being has turned into a mist
smoking my very existence,
you, as beknown, have set into the darkness of the moon!

In the very same room

behind the doors

are my longing and your Photo

a pot of flower is my freedom

and sweaty loneliness…

My night confessions have a desert face….

the letter I wrote

is on its way to you…

You

cannot come back to me…

You are the one

who left on a Sunday night in July…

Even if I called hesitant

you would turn your eyes away

to the rose gardens of every color

but crimson…

Yet, you

do not love

anything but red roses….

(Translated by Selin Ozgen)

Love, 

Hope my letter finds you well…

What do humans have if they don’t have their humble hope for the future?

And our most valuable treasure is our health; what is the pleasure of living 100 years without a good health?

And what is the meaning of leading a long, a lonely life without being truly loved and cared about?

One of us is left so alone in our relation…I only have hope…It was too hard on me to accept your absence…But once you love someone truly, you sacrifice your own self…I am trying really hard to keep my health up; lately I spend more time at the gym, working out a lot…When this hurricane calms down, I need to be in good shape and in good soul, cause every storm calms down one day…

Love, I feel sorry for you; you sounded bad on the phone…Now I know for sure that you have a terrible cold, cause you wouldn’t take antibiotics if you really didn’t need that…I know you…

I miss you a lot…What matters is where you find yourself after the storms are over…I am standing still, my arms wide open just in front of this storm, and I will be right at the very same place after this darkness ends…Cause I am strong enough…I feel strong only because I have your love…

We hit the road with a great passion and love…I am still on the road with the very same passion and love…Actually, my love for you is growing bigger day by day, cause everyday you are getting more into my life…

I am sitting right in front of the post office in the car and writing you all these words…And I will mail this to you…In this envelope I am sending you our memories which were the real evidences of our love…Just look into your beautiful eyes and look at your big smile…You and I, we both look absolutely happy, you are happy!

And what makes you happy?

Our Love!

My Love!